Friends are a good thing, and Facebook is a very bad thing. An actual friend, that you might meet some day, that you want to or even need to stay in contact with one another, is a beautiful thing. Facebook lures you into thinking that several hundred people are your friends, and that they hang on every word of yours, and you on theirs. And then, if you leave, as I have today, for the sixty-ninth time I admit, you realize that Facebook is a delusion of contact that isn't there. If you are lonely and you facebook, you are still lonely. Its just that that loneliness is more colorful and amusing, but you may in fact not have any real friends. Friends that don't need an excuse, or some official role, to care about contacting you.
I'd rather face my condition as it is. As it is, if I am not my own friend, other than my son, I probably don't have any friends. That's a good thing to face, because it really does begin with me. This very challenge I am in can be a tremendous act of compassion and caring for myself, as only the best of real friends would offer, or it can be a performance for bunch of people that don't really give a shit, because they have their own life and dramas to understand and deal with.
I think I am going to go hang around some twelve-step meetings in the upcoming weeks. Facebook was and is an unmitigated addiction, and one that deluded me into believing I was happier because of it, but probably the exact opposite was true.
I am 30 days into this challenge and I am maintaining 20 lbs of weight lost, and I want to go further next month. I want to accomplish something because it is an actual good thing in my life, and in the life of my son whom I dearly love. Facebook is a distraction, and has nothing of any value to offer me.
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